A Final Farewell
by IceMaidenOfLegend
Summary: She loves him selfishly still. - 仙劍奇俠傳三.


A Final Farewell

Zǐ Xuān stands in the countryside. The falling snow flakes flutter gracefully to the ground. Their pristine beauty is a rare sight. Whenever her eyes are greeted by the sight of snow she always remembers her first lifetime with Chǎngqīng.

She was young and naïve. They were in love and she believed that nothing would come between them. She was foolish but in love she has always been a fool. The world was a place of peace and then it shattered. He was gone; stolen away. The priests, meant to be so pure and kind, captured him with a lie.

However, the lie itself was not immensely important. Zǐ Xuān sighs, her breath misting in the air. She stares at the snowflakes on her palm. They are pure, untainted and heart-wrenchingly beautiful. With a soft breath she wafts them away.

They fall carelessly over the edge of her fingertips. A breeze rushes past them as they descend. The memory of their first parting fills her mind. They were chased away to the edge of a cliff where they kneeled before the clouds. Even the sky disapproved of their love but they loved too greatly to have their fate controlled.

The graceless fall from the cliff is a memory of unbelievable clarity.

Zǐ Xuān's frail hands slowly move to her face. She tentatively touches her cheeks. A trail of salt water leads down her face. She doesn't like to think too deeply of their partings. The pain that she suffered each time he perished was too great.

Yet, he always returned. His name was Lín Yepíng when they met again. His face was the same and so was his place. He still loved her even though he didn't remember her. He broke one of his vows for her sake. They fought to be together. That time they succeeded.

She wasn't such a fool at that time. A soft smile overcomes her sorrows. Her eyes turn to the far away river. The snow nearby isn't as pure. The beauty has faded to something else. She still wouldn't call it ugly. She would consider it as she always has – winter's sorrows; the tears of a mourning season.

She still doesn't know how many tears she shed that time. Her memories of his first life tore them apart in the second. She didn't understand it at the time but she was beginning to realise the true fate lying before them. As her marriage lay in ruins she chose to give her life for her people.

He also made a choice. Zǐ Xuān wraps her arms around herself; a sudden chill running through her heart. His blood covered her. His last words have haunted her endlessly. Even now she can't forgive herself for the pain she caused him.

"Nǐ..." she whispers to the sky. "Wǒ ài nǐ."

Xú Chǎngqīng is his current name. He is, once more, a priest. This time he will reach enlightenment, she knows. He will become a Daoist immortal while her life withers away. She can't help but feel sad. She forced him to forget her and the love he had for her.

She can feel the world's worries fading away from her. A quiet peacefulness has been invading her mind. She knows that it's her death creeping towards her. After pursuing her love for two hundred years she's almost ready to let go.

Her selfish love refuses to wither. She still wants to be by Chǎngqīng. She still wants to have more time with their daughter, Qīng'er, despite their past. She feels little harm in indulging with fantasies. She allows herself to be selfish without entering their lives. They don't need her.

She turns her gaze to Tiāntáng longingly. "Nǚ wā, duìbùqǐ,"

**Author's Note: There are no words to describe my love for ****仙劍奇俠傳****. There is no word great enough. I simply adore the series! The exception is this one… What an odd occurrence; the television series was better in terms of show quality… I don't understand why I simply despise the show. Of course, the exception is this couple right here. I adore this couple and, unfortunately, I can relate with Zǐ Xuān as I too love selfishly. I couldn't leave this be. I'm sure the game is superior to the series in a way that will have me liking. Anyway, thank you for reading. I know the Chinese is confusing but I hope that you enjoyed my piece. I apologise if you're confused or didn't like this.**

_Wǒ ài nǐ – I love you. Tiāntáng – Heaven. Duìbùqǐ – I'm sorry. Nǚ wā – a Goddess._

**Part of the Revival Collection.**


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